What Not To Say To Individuals With Autism Disorder

In terms of neurodiversity, autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is classified by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Autism is a symbol of variations in the structure and operation of the brain. Some autistic persons do not see themselves as disabled, even though many of them are. Diagnosed autism does not show any differences from neurotypical individuals in terms of different abilities. Rather, it indicates that in order to succeed, an individual may require different degrees of accommodation and assistance.

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Receiving a diagnosis frequently seems daunting. Understanding that autism is a condition rather than a disease that requires to be treated is crucial. In order to live life to its fullest with the fewest possible disturbances to their everyday functioning, it means that an individual may require various assistance, environmental modifications, and coping mechanisms for low functioning. For them to operate well in their world, some autistic people need adjustments to their routines and surroundings so they can live independently.

According to research and a blog post, people with autism may experience stress and anxiety, which can negatively impact their ability to cope with life’s challenges and maintain emotional stability. Some of these challenges are a result of societal norms, which frequently require neurodivergent individuals to adhere to neurotypical standards. In addition, compared to non-autistic individuals, autistic ones are more likely to experience trauma and abuse.

Does The Condition Go Away In Time?

Autism does not go away with age in its affected person or a kid. Even though early childhood is frequently when autism features first appear, autistic children or kids eventually become autistic adults and require the parents’ formal care. Nonetheless, the typical issue is that a lot of healthcare professionals won’t assess adults, and after an assessment, a lot of autistic individuals receive incorrect diagnoses or are incorrectly informed they are not autistic. Many members of the autism community are accepting self-assess as a result of these obstacles.

A person with autism exhibits neurodivergence, which is characterized by brain functioning that deviates from what is thought to be neurotypical. Individuals with autism face ongoing pressure because they are required to think, behave, and feel like neurotypical people. They are also expected to present or hide in ways that satisfy others, which can be discouraging. Since many autistic adults have had at least one psychological diagnosis, these emotional responses may frequently resemble those of other mental health illnesses such as anxiety, depressive disorders, and PTSD.

Dealing with autism is not easy. For some individuals, it may seem like an easy situation. But they do not know how complicated it is to live entirely with a mental health condition. If you are not sure how to deal with the situation, don’t try to comment or give your harsh opinion to the one who struggles, especially if it is uncalled for. Here’s what not to say to individuals with autism disorder.

“I’m Sorry.”

Many people with autism tend to disregard their condition as tragic despite the fact that it undoubtedly presents special obstacles. Some even think that’s an essential component of what defines them as unique. Not to mention that, compared to neurotypicals, though not everyone, people on the spectrum frequently possess amazing strengths, including amazing memories, honesty, and a keen attention to detail. Because each person on the autism spectrum is distinctive, it is completely wrong to apologize or feel sorry for someone who has autism. This shows a great disdain for the experiences and intellectual disabilities of individuals.

“You seem so normal.”

It is quite common to talk or communicate and say this to autistic individuals whose disabilities are a lot more invisible than it is to others whose disabilities are very noticeable, like Asperger’s syndrome. It implies that someone must not have a handicap or be autistic just because they don’t seem to meet stereotypes of what autistic persons should sound or act like, which is offensive. At times, it can be hurtful to hear. Additionally, it implies that being “normal” is ideal for everyone to strive for and that it is consequently undesirable to behave or speak in manners that are typically associated with autism, even if such actions don’t harm others.

“You’re weird.”

Although each autistic person is unique, adjustments may be necessary in daily life. It is highly ineffective to assume, emphasize, and remind them that they have something strange or that their appearance differs when they

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require assistance. According to an expert, Temple Grandin, individuals with autism may dwell on it, particularly if they are unaware of anything strange about their behavior. It’s akin to arguing that their differences with other individuals are an issue that needs to be resolved. That frequently relies, though, on how others phrase it. Usually, it’s either neutral or uses harsh language, tone, or mannerisms. Positive comments of this kind are rarely made, although it is conceivable.

“You’re only using your condition to excuse your bad behavior.”

Telling someone with autism would be equivalent to informing them that their condition is a myth they made up to attract attention from others. Autism does not exist in fiction. Certain adult individuals indeed claim that people with autism embrace their condition because it allows them to rationalize their actions, but this does not imply that all autism cases are made up. Furthermore, because autism is a disorder that is invisible to others, there may be occasions when autistic persons are battling with a disability, and no one knows about it. Consequently, this comment undermines their battle with severe psychological disorders and could eventually weaken their emotional fortitude, and this can be incredibly hurtful.

“You don’t seem like the autistic person I know.”

Every individual with autism is unique from everyone else. Individual abilities, life skills, requirements, and challenges vary greatly between people with autism. Some essential variations in neurological performance, sensory and mental processing, and interpersonal skills frequently indicate autism. These discrepancies constitute the fundamental characteristics of autism. It is impossible to discern from a quick chat conducted with an individual or in the comments section of an online article what an autistic individual’s requirements and difficulties are vs. their strengths and skills. Therefore, talking to the individual and telling an autistic person (whether a child or an adult) that they are not like other autistic people in terms of appearance is equivalent to telling them that they do not fall into the category of individuals who require specialized care so they can regain their lives.

“Can you please stop fidgeting, jumping, flapping, spinning in public? It’s embarrassing.”

In most circumstances, flapping, swaying, twirling, jumping, or other actions—do not injure the person engaging in it or anybody else in the immediate vicinity. These repetitive activities are beneficial to autistic individuals as they prevent overstimulation of the mind. Hence, there is no harm in them. This phrase implies that the person with autism should cease acting in certain ways or move in spontaneous and natural ways. These actions are unintentional. This is quite disrespectful and inconsiderate, given the circumstances, especially if one heard it. Furthermore, it could be highly triggering (emotionally and psychologically painful) for certain individuals with autism.

“What’s it like to be Autistic?”

Asking someone you don’t know well about their experiences as an autistic person must be avoided unless it’s for an assembly or forum discussion. In that instance, composing more targeted questions would be more beneficial. Asking this might come out as more callous and uninterested. Furthermore, no two persons with autism are alike in their experiences, so it would be unfair to ask a query that suggests there is only one means to be autistic. Even though the majority of individuals have basic traits and experiences in common, their life narratives and interactions with other people are very diverse.

“Does that mean you’re retarded?”

Asking someone who has autism spectrum disorder this question is reflective. It reflects how the general public views those with developmental disabilities. Certain individuals maintain that a person with a developmental disadvantage is intrinsically inferior or worse than others. This is insulting to those with autism spectrum disorders, who strive so hard to exist in a society where others distinguish them from one another. Because of that specific cultural presumption, an autistic person might take this as akin to being told they are flawed and do not belong. However, this word can also refer to a circumstance that describes a psychological issue in detail, depending on how it is used.

“Oh, you must be really smart.”

Individuals with autism can differ in their IQ in the same way as neurotypical individuals can. An IQ can range from normal to genius in one autistic individual, but it can also fall into the average to much below average range in another. These people possess exceptional intelligence in certain areas, but their knowledge in others may be limited. Because the perception of one’s intelligence is not based on broad knowledge, this assertion is ironically inaccurate and baseless. Again, some autistic individuals can excel in some aspects or subject matter, but not all of them are potentially geniuses in everything.

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“You’re In A Relationship?”

In many respects, this one is a little harsh. Experts explain that certain individuals believe that individuals with autism cannot build loving emotional bonds with others because they have a neurological disorder that prevents them from feeling empathy in particular situations. In response, the answer is that individuals with autism can engage in intimate connections and have sex. Some people marry and start families. Therefore, it is completely offensive to ask someone with autism whether they are capable of falling in love and starting a relationship out of confusion. And note that perhaps the other couple is coping with a partner’s ASD as well.

 

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

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